I was unable to have the guts to let my co-workers know about my decision to not re-contract all of last week, however, I finally did this morning. I didn't give any pre-warning, but simply dragged my chair up next to my Boss and told him my decision in simple, short sentences.
As he can't anyway due to the rules of my contract as it is up to us whether we stay for another year or not, he didn't say anything against me not wanting to stay. Instead, he gave me the bland "wakarimashita" ("I understand"), frowned, put his head in his hands and sighed that there were going to be complications with expenses and funds, though I told him that as I would be staying in Japan so there is no need for them to pay for my flight home.
My heart is still beating from the nerves and I feel a little sick about the whole thing.
It was almost like my decision caused more trouble, and that I'm this big burden on them now, more than ever.
I just couldn't stay, though...
Seeing my Boss react like this has made me realise even more that I hate my workplace and working with my co-workers.
I feel horrible yet relieved at the same time.
Let's just say I'm very much looking forward to my dinner date with a friend in Sapporo tonight.
God, I could eat a cake.
"And it makes you feel kinda empty doesn't it?
Nothing is there, which means anything's possible!
Let's go anywhere you want to go
Rocket on standby, Blast off before it rusts
Send it off as many times it can go
READY? 3.2.1. GO!
SPEED FREAKS BABY ROCKET DIVE
I wanna ride it before it rusts away
Once it's flown, it's all yours
Come on SPACE AGE BABY ROCKET DIVE
Bungy dive to a place unseen
To a universe where a new star shines
SAIL AWAY
No matter how many years we wait
We're still the world's man of leisure
It carries you and your missiles
Let's fly
SPEED FREAKS BABY ROCKET DIVE
I wanna fly to a place unseen
You are like a sudden spark, flying at top speeds
Come on SPEED FREAKS BABY ROCKET DIVE
Spread your wings and FLY
So say ADIOS to your awaiting yesterdays
To a world where a new star shines
SAIL AWAY"
- ROCKET DIVE, hide
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I also dreaded telling my (new) boss I was leaving my school. It felt even worse after he apologized for the abrupt changes in ownership and I had to assure him that wasn't the problem. Just...I don't feel really welcome anymore. Hm.
ReplyDeleteChange are good, and now you've done it! So keep fighting, Mio~ ^^
Aw, are you changing jobs too?
DeleteI also hope things turn out for you too! Thank you, and good luck to you! xoxo
I understand how you feel when you told your boss. It's like your boss puts pressure of the company's losses upon your shoulders when you tell them you are going to leave.
ReplyDeleteWhen you wrote this, it reminded me of the situation I was in and I am so glad I left because I hated the company and store I worked at too. I am much happier doing my internship right now even though I'm not being paid. Let's hope in your next job it won't be like this for you okay? :)